Cuz Its Never Too Late....

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong
Who would have guessed it
I will not leave alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like it's not too late
It's never too late

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late

No one will ever see
This side reflected
And if there's something wrong
Who would have guessed it
And I have left alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like
It's not too late
It's never too late

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late

The world we knew
Won't come back
The time we've lost
Can't get back
The life we had
Won't be ours again

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong

Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late
Maybe we'll turn it around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late (It's never too late)
It's not too late
It's never too late
~Never Too Late~Three Days Grace~from the album One X

Theres the SOng of the Day. I think i'm going to start a new blog for songs. like a song of the day/Artist of the week thing.
I think itd be cool. Ima start on that after this post.
So. Guess what? being in ROTC is finally paying off, a little. theres a drill competition in the program and we're competting form Honor FLight, which is apparently "AMAZING" and i've even heard that "winning HOnor FLight is better than meeting Edward Cullen himself." I doubt its that good. but anyway. the drill portion is a major part of it. And the top nine cadets in the flight get to compete and im one of the nine! yayness! and NIkkis coming to watch {which idk on how thats working but....} and then im checkin myself out and were getting food!! I still hate this uniform though, its too baggy. Its like really loose in the jacket until it gets to the wrists then its like skin tight and it stops right at the wrist which anyone who knows me knows i CANT STAND that. at all. and lets see what else...oh English! so english was absoluetly hilarious. the dvd player stopped working so everyone was making fun of Cauis's solutions and me and Helen kept suggesting JAne come help him. And speaking of the lovely Twilight, look at the quote i found on the imdb.com page for Twilight

[from trailer]
Edward Cullen: You better hold on tight, spider-monkey!

SPIDER MONKEY?! what the hell?!
someone pleased explain to me where edward might POSSIBLY say this because i dont see it! ugh!
i mean, seriously? Spider-monkey?COuld ya at least say something a bit more....edward-esque? because thats a "what the hell" moment right there. ugh! well im going to start up the songs blog. see ya later.
peace
~KAyy ♥

FOLLOW THE POWER HUNGRY VAMPIRE!

Peep the style and the kids checking for it
The number one question is
How could you ignore it
We drop right back in the cut
Over basement tracks
With raps that got you backing this up like
(rewind that)
We're just rolling with the rhythm
Rise from the ashes of the stylistic division
With these non-stop lyrics of life living
Not to be forgotten
But still unforgiven
But in the meantime there are those who wanna
Talk this and that
So I suppose it gets to a point
Feelings gotta get hurt
And get dirty with the people spreading the dirt
(It goes)

Try to give you warning
But everyone ignores me
(Told you everything loud and clear)
But nobody's listening
Call to you so clearly
But you don't want to hear me
(Told you everything loudu and clear)
But nobody's listening

I got a
Heart full of pain
Head full of stress
Handfull of anger
Held in my chest
And everything left is aw aste of time
I hate my rhymes
(But I hate everyone else's more)
I�m riding on the back of this pressure
Guessing that it�s better
I cant keep myself together
Because all of this stress
Gave me something to write on
The pain gave me something
I could set my sights on
You never forget the blood sweat and tears
The uphill struggle over years
The fear and the trash talking
And the people it was to
And the people that started it
Just like you

I got a
Heart full of pain
Head full of stress
Handful of anger
Held in my chest
Uphill struggle
Blood, sweat and tears
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear
(Coming at you)
~Nobody's Listening~Linkin Park

Okay so i've gotten complaints *Kaila!* about the song lyrics. just skip over them if you dont want to read them. easy as that. And no, Kansas, I havent read ur stories yet but im working on it. I would read them today but i have to find an alternate party plan for Helen because she was informed this mornign this will be her last birthday party because her moms afraid kids will start drinking at hte parties. And now shes thinking the tea party is kinda lame. So as BFOTBG (haha spin on the Gilmore Girls BFOTB haha) I have to try to find a new party plan. FUn. More ideas on that later. I have to find a cookie recipe too for AJ. You remember right? the kid we had to convince godzilla wasnt real? well AJ"s like a little kid in a lot of ways. Like if ya hurt him itsd scar him. and i wasnt thinking about this fact adn during our little writing workshop i gave him a three on word choice because he used the same words over and over, and everyone else got 4. So he sees and gets his feeling hurt and i feel terrible so i change it to a four and im baking cookies to get back on his good side. And i guess ill give some to everyone in English too.Oh and there was a fire drill today. me and HElen were having an interesting conversation. see below
Helen: If this was a real fire we'd all die cuz we're walking slow
Me: no, Caius would save us
Helen:No he wouldnt
Me: yeah he would. he wants more vampires
Helen: why doe she want more vampires?
Me: so the vampire world can take over hte hman world
Helen: but the vampires dont want to take over hte world. They want less vampires
Me: yeah but theres a revolt and now Cauis was intent on world domination
Helen:But why would Cauis want to rule the world?
Me: He's a power hungry vampire and wants to rule the world
Now we were approaching Coach Rice aka Cauis
Helen: Go ask him
Me:okay.
*looks over at Cauis*
Me: Hey Caius? *no response* Coach Rice?
Cauis: Yeah?
Me: Are you intent on world domination?
Cauis: Yes
Me: *turning to HElen* SEE!!!!!!
haha it was funny then he started to walking towards the building before they gave the all clear and this conversation occured
Helen: wheres he going? is he trying to kill us in the fire?! (there was no fire lol)
Me: FOLLOW THE POWER HUNGRY VAMPIRE!
it was pretty damn funny. and now i am going to brainstorm ideas for helens party:
~James suggested laser tag.
~i'm thinking somethign at her house
~I suggested somethign Beatles themed but HElen shot it down
~uhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
~Cotton Eyed Joes!
~oh shit.
~That might work.
~okay run the cotton eyed joes idea past helen....
what else....
hmmm.
i dont know.
okay well im a go off in search of a good party idea and cookie recipe for AJs cookies. I'm off.
Till later, loves.
~Kayy

Number Two Of April 11!

PLEASE READ "ADVENTURE?" BELOW THIS ONE!!!

Now I know
That I can't make you stay
But where's your heart?
But where's your heart?
But where's your...

And I know
There's nothing I could say
To change that part
To change that part
To change...

So many
Bright lights to cast a shadow
But can I speak?
Well is it hard understanding
I'm incomplete
A life that's so demanding
I get so weak
A love that's so demanding
I can't speak

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you could say can stop me going home

Can you see
My eyes are shining bright
Cause I'm out here
On the other side
Of a jet black hotel mirror
And I'm so weak
Is it hard understanding
I'm incomplete
A love that's so demanding
I get weak

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you could say can stop me going home

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you could say can stop me going home

These bright lights have always blinded me
These bright lights have always blinded me
I say

I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I'd never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

(How can I see, I see you lying) 'Cause I see you lying next to me
(How can I see, I see you lying) With words I thought I'd never speak
(How can I see, I see you lying) Awake and unafraid
(How can I see, I see you lying) Asleep or dead

'Cause I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I'd never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

'Cause I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I'd never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
(Or dead)
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you could say can stop me going home
(Or dead)
I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
(Or dead)
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you could say can stop me going home
(Or dead)
I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
(Or dead)
Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home

okay for seriously now. this is post numebr two for today, please, please, please, please read "Adventure?" below this one for me. So i have decided that not only does school prove to be useless, so doeseverythign else in this life. I mean seriously now what is the whole point for any of this? But, however, the song has pointed something out to me. You prove yourself weak if you just leave everything. And weak=bad. and we do not like that. at all. RIght? If your weak you can be defeated and held down.

Pain is weakness leaving the body.

that statement is not really all that true. That statement probably justifies alot for people. But unless u succeed somethign from this pain, its useless.
im off for now
we're fixing to leave
~Kayy

Adventure?

The night is so long when everything's wrong
If you give me your hand I will help you hold on
Tonight,
Tonight.
I won't let you say goodbye,
I'll be your reason why.
The last night away from me,
Away from me.

Okay yea, so i've posted skillet alot but whatever. And thanks to both Kansas and Helen for giving me ideas for music! i am seriously needing some. that and movies. but i have to have money for movies. Music i bum off everyone's itunes lol. And that Tibetan Plateau thing is a good idea, Kansas, thanks! haha. No everyone in the Cult (ROTC) has decided that instead of shipping her off we're just gonna piss her off really mad and ignore her constantly. If she tells us to do something, do the opposite, if she tries to talk to you look away. Stuff like that. Yes, a bit childish i know but its better than getting all pissed off at her and threatening to ship her off in the dead of the night. Plus, there's no police-involvement this way. Oh, so Nikki's coming in this weekend with Mason. For those of you who dont know, (since i now have out-of-state readers {hi Kansas!} im so psyched bout that!) Nikki's my 20 year old sister and Masons my 2 year old nephew. So they're comin up this week and its gonna be great. She should be on the road already. Haha i just read something on Yahoo about Vanilla Ice getting arrested. About time! Did you see that guy on Surrel Life? Holy shit hes got as temper! haha. So whats up with everyone! im bored outta my mind, this class is pointless and well school in general is pretty pointless. Okay, well not really, i'm dreading summer (more on that in a minute) School's pretty okay i guess. Not that great though. I mean the only good reason to come is to bug Caius (Coach Rice, English teacher, fun to annoy) and to hang out with people. and internet time in here. Oh, adn to hear Colonel say "Suck Squeeze, Bang Blow" every so often. haha. Ohh, i gotta remember to bribe Weston for my Trix bar!!! gotta remember that! Oh and Why I'm Dreadin Summer list:
1. No friends
2. Nothing to do
3. Hot as Hell
4. Nothing to do

Good enough? hope so. dude so i had the weirdest moment last night. Out of nowhere i texted both Helen and Kaila and told them that we should go somewhere like now. I want an adventure! And I think Japan's a pretty spiffy idea thank you very much. I mean how can it not be? Right? Remember the other day when i posted "Holiday" by Boys Like Girls lyrics? Okay so a holiday would be pretty nice right now. I'm so sick of this, doing the same damn thing over and over, day after day. Its boring. it's lifeless, its.......BORING. I mean arent we supposed to have some kind of life? Not sitting day after day doing the same thing. I want an adventure! Kaila kindly pointed out that we might go to the Beach this summer but what goods that if we've been a thousand and three times?! It's not! I want to do somethign that most people wouldnt dare do! Ugh! Wheres the Life and Death Brigade when you need them! Wheres Matt Czurchry stalking me calling me Ace every five seconds?! I'll tell you where he is! he's following the girls who actually do something with their lives, not type uselessly on a blog for peoples enjopyment (no offense, loyal blog-readers) UGH! Japan is a pretty spiff-tacular idea right now! Okay well thats not get too crazy, Japan is a bit overdramatic. But what about our wonderful adventure to California?! What baout that! We were supposed to go to California, take a detour through Colorado for Sky, go stalk the Cullens up in Forks, hang witht eh werewolves! and what are we doing now?! We're lucky if we reach Six Flags Over Texas! we're lukcy if we get past the Mississippi River! hell, if we get past Graceland, Elvis will rise from the dead to congratulate us! But its not just the length of the trip that changed thats pissing me off. Its the fact that the Roadtrip of our lives was planned for after graduation! ALMoST THREE YEARS FROM NOW!!! I've already started saving for this trip only to have it be cut short a couple thousand times! And now, there is no Roadtrip. Theres a small drive to maybe Atlanta and thats it! I mean seriously?! And so there is no adventure. and people say, oh when you get your license, when you get a car you can go, but let me tell ya buddy, have you SEEN those gas prices?! there is no way in hell i'd be able to do anything! I mean seriously! And its not like when i did have a car i would be allowed to go whenever! i'd have to ask permission then go, and shes not gonna let me be out of the house 24/7. Thus i would have to raise my window without raising the blinds, remove the screen, climb out the window, close the window from the outside, replace the screen, start the car, and leave while praying the whole time that leann doesnt wake up, realize its not me in the bed but rather my 6 foot stuffed tiger and tell mom. So therefore i am screwed for life out of my adventures. I mean when you were little you had all knids of adventures: climbing onto the top of the playhouse and the swingset, telling your little sister shes an alien, i mean we had fun. Now, our fun is maybe getting to listen to music with a friend. I mean seriously. Well, unless your Helen, "watchin COlbert" haha (kidding Helen) but seriously like everyone else i know has fun except me i get to have zero fun. And it sucks.

Well, im ending this emotastic blog for now.

~Kayy

Useless Babbling.

And to start us out....My Obsession-Skillet

Your touch, your ways
Leave me dumb without reason
Your love, my cage
My prison so pleasing
I spend my days
Tangled in thoughts of you
Stuck in this place
Resigned to be your fool

I thirst no longer
Drenching my soul
Pour out like water

You’re my only infatuation
Don’t leave me stranded
In my obsession
My purpose, my possession
Live and die in my obsession
My obsession

Oh

Come down to me
Don’t ever say that it’s over
I kiss your feet
Worship the air you breathe
Your love, my gift
You go and I will follow
My dream, my wish
Don’t leave me here so helpless

I thirst no longer
Drenching my soul
Pour out like water

You’re my only infatuation
Don’t leave me stranded
In my obsession
My purpose, my possession
Live and die in my obsession
My obsession

Am I a lunatic?
I’m going crazy
For just a word from
For just a touch from you

And I’m exploding like chemicals
I’m going crazy, can’t get enough (2x)

I thirst no longer
I thirst, yeah
Drenching my soul
Drenching, oh

I thirst no longer
Drenching my soul
Pour out like water

You’re my only infatuation
Don’t leave me stranded
In my obsession
My purpose, my possession
Live and die in my obsession
Oh, oh, oh, my obsession
Oh, oh, oh, my obsession
My obsession

So has anyone else noticed my strange obsession with posting songs that mean one thing i twist em to mean something totally differnt? i love it. Dude, i am so psyched! I got an out-of-state reader too! Hi Kansas!!!! Oh and about the fake-accent things, Kansas pointed out that theirs nothing wrong with it, except for the fact that Beth does it constantly and no one can make her shut up! And I am teaching Beth how to cuss right because she cant do it. She thinks that every other word must be a cuss word and the cuss words must alternate between "fuck" and "shit" and its annoying. I have told her im not listening to her until she learns to cuss correctly. Does anyone remember in I, Robot where Shia LeBouf played Farber, and he couldnt cuss?

NS5 Robots: You have been deemed hazardous. Will you comply?
Farber: You can kiss my ass, metal dick!

Farber: I got this fine-ass little yummy. I mean she is complete and agreeable, ass-hot spankable, Spoon.
Detective Del Spooner: What does that even mean?
Farber: You know what that means, now stop barracadin' and give me the damn-ass keys!
Detective Del Spooner: First off, stop cussing, cause you're not good at it.
Farber: Well at least give me ten for the bus, man. I been there for you.
Detective Del Spooner: Go home.
Farber: Okay. That's strike one, Spoon. That's strike one!


Farber: Oh, Mother-damn, she just shot at you with her eyes closed, Spoon.
Detective Del Spooner: Hey! Did you just shoot at me with your eyes closed?
Susan Calvin: Well it worked, didn't it?
Farber: Spoon, she is shit-hot, man. You gotta put in a good word for me.
Detective Del Spooner: Stop cussing!
Farber: And go home, I gotcha.
Detective Del Spooner: [to Calvin] *Aim* and fire.

Farber cusses better than Beth does, mmkay? this kid needs help. Seriously because, no. Like direct quote from Beth. "Mother fuck, why the fuck di dyou not let me fucking have some shit" talking about PURFUME, what the bloody hell! (ok, Kansas, so taking some accents is pretty cool but not constantly). Gah, Bored Muchly ™
So im stealing helens idea and im makin a list thingy too because browsing internet and useless babbling in a boring type format==sucks. K? So heres we go
--classes suck this semester.
--no really
--English is okay though
--AJ's pretty funny
--Krebs is annoying though
--2nd is this
--Blogging
--And nothing else
--Kinda boring.
--third is ROCTy
--No commment, self explainatory.
--I want coffee
--bad.
--and cookies
--my arm hurts
--I ran into another pole today
--it hurt.
--I think i've formed another bruise.
--I need to talk to Helen about creating an ad for my site too
--help me remember
--cms sucks
--i need new songs on my ipod
--Any suggestions, Kansas?
--bored muchly ™
-- Verdammen Sie es zu Hölle
--Lets go get the stripper at Walmart. lol
--Lets go to Japan
--No really
--I'll do it
--Bored.
--this class sucks
--i have another hour in here
--Kill me no
--no wait, dont
--Lets go watch Elmo
--Or Dora
--Either works
--Whats with everyone wearing kid show backpacks and stuff? its weird
--haha I still have Cheetos from the lockin
--on February 8, 2008
--they're pretty good
--Jeff Foxworthy: This one goes out to the younger ones out there. If your mother still drives you to school, you ain't no "gangsta", pull your pants up! Your back pockets should not be behind your knees!
--Haha
--u should check out kaila's blog
--i post on there occasionally.
-- ordinarily-unperfect.blogspot.com
--dude
--boredom.
--im gettin off.
--see ya

--Kayy

The Big Rant

If you want to live, let live
if you want to go, let go ~Cloud Nine~Evanescense

So What Now? That is my big question, and ultimately my big rant. My dear friends get read for the emoness mood, where's my EmoBear (which is really the Care Bear Sleepy Bear haha) WHeres my EmoBear and EmoLIght (which is a Disney Princess Night Light) this is gonna be a good one. WHat Now? everytime i try to do something, theres the great fun in everything, the excitment, but then what? youre stuck, with that rush of adrealine, and all that pent-up energy but you cant do anything but let it slowly drain from you. You cant do anything. What Now? I mean if you think about it then life's kind of like that too. the fun then the WHat Now? part. its like a big circle of nothing. I dont get it.
but then again a bunch of people dont. but what now? we just sit here doing nothing? but then that leads to another big thing. why dont people just do what they want? For example, i know people who will want somethign btu instead of doing it they sit around. they want to go tell somebody something but don't.. thats annoying, do what you want. if you want to tell somebody to shut up, tell them to shut up. if you want to jsut run up and hug them for no apparent reason, do it. if you want to punch someone, punch them. if you want to kiss someone, kiss them. if you want to scream and yell, do it. just do what you want and forget about what other people might think. thats annoying because everyone knows you want to do it but you won't. you just won't do it. and you know why you wont do it? you're afraid of what they'll say.
and honestly, you shouldn't give a bloody hell what they'll think or their reactions, you should think about what YOU do about it. then the follow-up with What Now? are you just gonna do it and run away and pretend it didnt happen and just ignore it. thats even more annoying. if you wanted to do it that bad, then u must've meant it, which means its shitty to act as if it didnt happen. when you know bloody well it did. and now you have to answer this.
What Now?


~Kayy
PS. i think the bloody British have gotten ahold of me. haha i bit Brit at the end. teehee.

Bordeness Muchly ™

And I don't wanna fall to pieces
I just wanna sit and stare at you.
I don't wanna talk about it
And I don't want a conversation
I just wanna cry in front of you.
I don't wanna talk about it
'Cause I'm in love with you.

~Fall to Pieces by AVril Lavigne

love the song.
im bored. and freezing my ass off. For those who dont know i wore a skirt today and its like neg. degrees outside. im cold. ugh i have service dress tomorrow
gag me ugh another like thirty minutes in here. im bored. and cold. and hungry. hmm... wonder whats for dinner... oh well....
dude so for those who dont know im killing beth today. she told me something that wasnt true, she made it up, and it drove me insane for like ever. it was like an extrememly bad, bitchy thing for her to do. SHe even played along saying how sorry she was for me and "everything im going through" so i decided to get back at her, im telling her her boyfriends cheating on her. But i figured thats too bitchy and puts me at her level so im just not talkign to her for awhile and not listening to anythng she says. from like now on. end of story. Fin
So theres that story of that drama. other than that there's nothing.
Dude i just checked weather--it 52 degrees outside right now which means im about to freeze when we leave in about 25 minutes. dude, im screwed. i knew there was a downside to thi whole skirt thing. oh well. guess the skirts can wait a bit longer till its actually halfway warm and im not freezing my ass off. lol dude im bored. so okay most people know about the little bang thing i have right? the little strip of hair always in my eyes. well i think im gonna dye that one piece iwth temporary die liek braid it then dye it so its checkerboarded. but i dont know. when i get money ill go to hot topic and get some dye. im thinkin purple or blue. i dont know yet. maybe. id get bitched at by Colonel and Sargent though. oh well they can kiss my ass. They dont own me. oh my god thats another thing i absouluetly hate. okay so when i went to JAcksonville for Daniels deployment they were all talking and somehow the conversation went to what if Nikki gave daniel a hickey beofre he left? Nikki would get fined and he would get a heavier fine for "destruction of US property" yeah! the military owns them! how fucked up is that! the military and governemnt owns them! like for example if well u read it up there. 666
james says hi
bored.
no what?
rant over
gone.
im out.
peace, loves
~Kayy

The Music Gods Have Humor

If i go crazy then will u still call me superman? if im alive and well will you be there holding my hand? i keep you by mysdide with my superhuman mind kryptonite

Kryponite--3 Doors Down

You know what? im tired of having to be "Momma" to everyone and having to be worried about everyone else. You know what i want to do?
Blare The Beatles really loud and just sink into the mellowness of it all.
u know, i think i might go to the hosue today instead of Mimi's get some Apple Jacks and blare Beatles and just mellow out.

Aaaaaahhhhhh...
Because the world is round it turns me on
Because the world is round...aaaaaahhhhhh

Because the wind is high it blows my mind
Because the wind is high...aaaaaaaahhhh

Love is all, love is new
Love is all, love is you

Because the sky is blue, it makes me cry
Because the sky is blue...aaaaaaaahhhh

Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh...
Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh...
Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh...

~Because by the Beatles

how can you not mellow out to that song??? and thats the full song too. Ugh, i wish the damn bell would ring already, i need to go now! i cant stay in this room any fucking longer! these stupid guys are driving me insane! i swear to Carlisle! and it doesnt help that everyones asking me where James is. Im not his keeper! i dont fucking know! okay? nd its not helping with you dumbasses asking me! okay? so just leave me the fuck alone! ugh! i need my beatles bad man. Im gonna go become a Hippie cool? i hope so because thats ewhat im gonna do. im going to become nothing but a hippie eating my apple jacks and mellowing out to the Beatles. Cool? I just have to get Hobo Stab Insurance to be official. cool? can anyone else tell im just doing this to try to keep myself busy? cuz thats all im doing. cool? soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
4 1/2 hours of Guitar Hero can kill you. I dreamed Guitar Hero, owke up singing Mississippi Queen by Mountain (1970!)okay? thats bad! ugh i need Beatles on my ipod! bad! especially today. dude. that was weird! i tried to type and im not really thinking about what im typing or anythign like my minds thinking it hands typing and i typed "Escape" hhaahaahahaha thats what i need an escape. ooh music gods have humor! this song just came on:

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's ok. It's ok. It's ok.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall
[ Your Guardian Angel lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away,
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be ok
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven
~~YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL~~ RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS

haha stupid music gods suck majorly. i dont want to listen to depressing songs! i need my Beatles to get me out of the emoness mood. aahhh! i think i pissed off the music gods, ipods not playing...fixed it! just kidding!
haha so me and helen have decided that our Religion is Music. COol? so from now on, i am not crossing myself like the Catholic Im not, im not gonna be the Baptist kid, or any of that bull shit. I am of the Music Religion.COol? Ugh lack of Beatles driving me insane. i need beatles for a minute! just a little shot of it not much. oh my buddist Carlisle god (oh im not Buddist either. i am of the music religion) im talking about the Beatles as if they were drugs. AhH! damn Helen to the pits of hell for introducing me to such a toxic, addictive substance. haha. no, if i damn helen, im going to. Wait, i'd have to damn her to the pits of music hell, which would be like all "Devil WEnt Down to Georgia" like and nonstop rock. which wuld rock. so. yes. i damn myself to Hell. Haha. wait then the Beatles and hippie music would be Heaven? ugh! i am torn between Heaven and HEll. AHH! oh well. dont care. either works.
we got Heaven vs. Hell.
Beatles vs. ROck.
Mellow thinking vs. no thinking.
Wish do u choose?
haha
okay so seriously now. the bell should be ringing soon. no. its only 11:30. we stay here for about another 25 minutes. ahhhh im bored. ..........................................................................
ugh i have PT next. gag me I hope we play Volleyball though so i can show everyone i do play volleyball and im not scared of the fucking ball like Taylor accused.ugH !i hate him. i really do. i know theres the whole dont hate anyone thing but too bad i hate the guY! hes annoying and rude and ugh! whatever.
im going.
bells about to ring.
hopefully.
dont forget to chekc todays other post below this one

~Kayy

Last Night

You come to me with your scars on your wrist
You tell me this will be the last night feeling like this
I just came to say goodbye
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine
But I know it's a lie

This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything you need me to be

Your parents say everything is your fault
But they don't know you like I know you
They don't know you at all
I'm so sick of when they say
It's just a phase, you'll be o.k. you're fine
But I know it's a lie

This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything you need me to be
The last night away from me

The night is so long when everything's wrong
If you give me your hand
I will help you hold on
Tonight, tonight

This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything you need me to be

I won't let you say goodbye
And I'll be your reason why
The last night away from me
Away from me

So today has not been a good day at all like AT ALL.
most people know what im talking about
basicly, i was told that if someone wasnt here today then thats bad because then hes not here like here here anywhere. follow? and thats bad. some people would be happy but im not. this is bad. this is very very bad like superbad without mclovin bad.
and thats not good.
at all.
like remember that emoness mood where i said life doesnt matter.
i was wrong. i was very very wrong. life does matter, it matters alot. and....it matters. end of story, everyone matters, end of story.
Fin.
Got it?
Good.
~Kayy

Last Resort

So i decided that the only way to even express how fucked up life is is with a beautiful song. its not the entire song but it still means the same. enjoy...
Cut my life into pieces
I've reached my last resort, suffocation, no breathing
Don't give a fuck if I cut my arms bleeding
Would it be wrong, would it be right
If I took my life tonight, chance are that I might
Mutilation out of sight and I'm contemplating suicide
Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Nothing's alright, nothing is fine
I'm running and I'm crying
I never realized I was spread too thin
Till it was too late and I was empty within
Hungry, feeding on chaos and living in sin
Downward spiral, where do I begin
......
No love for myself and no love for another
Searching to find a love upon a higher level
Finding nothing but questions and devils
Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Nothing's alright, nothing is fine
I'm running and I'm crying
...
~Last Resort by Papa Roach